If nothing else, let J.J. Abrams go down in history for his singular knack for torturing his fans. From the aughts' Felicity and Alias to Fringe and the Star Trek from which we expected so much more, the Hollywood impresario has for decades kept audiences, all of them millions-strong, leaning forward on their couches, howling at unbearable cliffhangers, and convening in huddled enclaves to debate intricate theories and minute plot details. But perhaps the best brain-bender he ever orchestrated was his and Damon Lindelof's profound, infuriating, terrifying, bizarre, exhilarating philosophical thriller Lost.
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Breaking Bad
The Wire
It's Always Sunny in PhiladelphiaWhen it began, the show attracted viewers by masquerading as a clean-cut adventure show about an airplane full of people who crash-land onto a seemingly deserted island and have to figure out, as protagonist Jack Shephard (Matthew Fox) puts it, how to "live together or die alone." Of course, that simple intrigue was short-lived, and before you could say, "Don't tell me what I can't do!" the show's turbine engine had sucked you into its vortex of insanity, a nonstop barrage that kept audiences' jaws on the floor as they turned to one other to ask in disbelief: "What the hell is going on?" Thanks to these infinitely cryptic puzzles and mythologies, Lost quickly and easily became one of the prototypical "prestige" dramas that truly cultivated the kind of raging, passionate online discussions that have only accelerated in *Lost'*s wake to become an inextricable cornerstone of how audiences consume television today. (Its intellectualism even made it into the halls of the academic elite.)
But of course, that kind of breakneck velocity and teeming volume has a cost, one that has, in in the four years since the show ended its final season, become somewhat of a cautionary tale, even to its creators. What with electric black smoke monsters that violently murder people (but sometimes choose not to?), polar bears that menace the survivors for a season and then inexplicably disappear, confusing deities that have been waging war on each other for centuries, time-travel and parallel universes, curses, haunting numeric patterns, and general existential despair, there were so many things happening on that damn island that by the show's final season audiences were overtaken by the sinking realization that there was absolutely no possible way that every question stuffed into every corner of this beloved hellhole could possibly be answered. That, of course, is why Lost has gone down in history as one of the most frustrating, fascinating, and ultimately doomed shows of all time.
Which of course, isn't to say you shouldn't binge-watch the hell out of it anyway. While its narrative waxed incredibly heavy-handed at times (a bunch of characters are named after philosophers and characters from The Wizard of Oz, for example, just in case you were in danger of forgetting just how much attention the Lost writing staff paid to completely meaningless details), *Lost'*s insanity is what makes it so incredibly fun, especially for intrepid television adventurers. As long as you go into this show with the expectation that you won't know all the answers, and you won't know which details are important until the very end, not only will you successfully side-step having to talk about the ending in therapy, it will be one of the most fun shows you'll ever watch.
Number of Seasons: 6 (121 episodes)
Time Requirements: 90 hours (3.75 days). Each episode averages about 43 minutes, so if you clock 10 hour-days (600 minutes, or about 14 episodes) on Saturdays and Sundays, it'll only take up a cool 4.5 weekends, or nine days, of your life. Wanna stretch it out? Watch four episodes per night (that's three hours) for 30 days. (That's without going back and re-watching episodes to pick up the minutiae, in which case, may the gods have mercy on your—nay, our—souls.)
Where to Get Your Fix: Netflix, Amazon Prime, DVD
Best Character to Follow: You're watching a show whose cast of characters and the things they do fluctuate so radically that choosing one to follow is almost impossible, so your choice will have to adapt constantly throughout your sojourn. That said, your best bets are Benjamin Linus (Michael Emerson) for the cryptic intrigue, Desmond Hume (Henry Ian Cusick) and Penny Widmore (Sonya Walger) for the plot urgency, and James "Sawyer" Ford (Josh Holloway) for the asshole humor (and perfect nicknames).
Seasons/Episodes You Can Skip:
As mentioned before, it's going to be generally terrible for your psychological well-being to skip too much of this show. Not that some of these episodes don't deserve to be forgotten forever—some of them are downright awful and seem arbitrary, like the writers were stalling until they had a better idea. But the seemingly useless details are what make Lost so gripping: you never know which ones will mean something later on. Still, here are a few you can ignore and get away with it.
Season 2: Episode 19, "S.O.S." The Bernard (Sam Anderson) and Rose (L. Scott Caldwell) subplot is sweet, but sadly, their story is totally meaningless in the overall tale of the show. Don't worry about it.
Season 3: Episode 5, "The Cost of Living" Mr. Eko (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) does some stuff that's not that interesting or important; Juliet (Elizabeth Mitchell) tells Jack to make Ben's operating table death look like an accident. Nothing happens that can't be covered in a "Previously on Lost" recap.
Season 3: Episode 9, "Stranger in a Strange Land" Jack goes to Thailand for whatever stupid reason and ends up getting the crap kicked out of him. If you start hating Jack, you might want to watch this one just for that. If you speak Chinese, definitely don't watch if you don't want to be annoyed.
Season 3: Episode 11, "Enter 77" An almost-bottle episode, this one involves Sayid (Naveen Andrews) reckoning with more torture stuff while the crazed Soviet Other Mikhail (Andrew Divoff) does some crazed stuff. There's a bizarre cat too. The cat means nothing, don't worry. (Also, all covered in a "Previously on Lost" recap.)
Season 4 The season where things start to fall apart. It's totally bonkers, so while you'll probably need to watch almost all of it to keep with the (many, many) plotlines, this is the season where you can stop paying so much attention if you don't feel like it. Seasons 5 and 6 you should watch in their entirety, but only so you and your fellow binge-watchers can laugh hysterically at how utterly insane your life and this show have become.
Seasons/Episodes You Can't Skip:
Season 1: Episode 1, "Pilot" For obvious reasons.
__Season 1: Episode 18, "Numbers" __ The one where Hurley (Jorge Garcia) wins the lottery and The Numbers first appear.
Season 1: Episode 19, "Deus Ex Machina" We learn about Locke (Terry O'Quinn)'s daddy issues (so many daddy issues on Lost!), and the hatch light switches on. (Plus, Sawyer gets some adorable eyewear.)
Season 2: Episode 3, "Orientation" The episode in which we see the first Dharma orientation video, opening up a whole new area of conspiracy theories. Nerds take note: There are a lot of these, and whether the host's name is different every time intentionally or not, it sure does make for good conversation.
Season 2: Episode 14, "One of Them" In which we meet "Henry Gale."
Season 2: Episode 17, "Lockdown" The hatch goes into lockdown mode, and Locke sees the Dharma station map.
Season 3: Episode 6, "I Do" Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans, Firefly fans, and perverts will all love this episode: Nathan Fillion guest stars, and Kate (Evangeline Lilly) and Sawyer have sex.
Season 3: Episode 20, "The Man Behind the Curtain" The episode where we finally learn Benjamin Linus' creepy backstory.
Season 3: Episodes 22 and 23, "Through the Looking Glass" Here's where you'll finally discover the origins of both "Not Penny's Boat" and "We have to go back!"
Season 4: Episode 5, "The Constant" Pretty much the most masterfully-crafted episode of the series. Desmond gets unstuck in time and his consciousness ping-pongs back and forth between 1996 and 2004—fun!
Season 6: Episode 11, "Happily Ever After" The time-travel/timeline shift thing starts making any sense at all.
Why You Should Binge:
Listen, I'm not going to lie here: There's a very good chance you're going to come out of this with more than one chip on your shoulder about having to spend over three straight days of your life on this infuriating piece of television history. Still, as I mentioned before, keeping this fact in mind will make it better. It's still a fantastic ride, one that has become, in just a few short years, a classic. It's also got a deep, involved, and kind of scary fandom who have put together any and all materials and answers you might need—philosophical, academic, narrative or otherwise. Plus, it's important you know these references!
Best Scene: Remember, this show is 90 hours of pure is-it-foreshadowing-or-isn't-it madness. There are about a million important scenes and it's up to you, dear binge-watcher, to choose your favorite. These are pretty classic, though.
The Takeaway:
When a show starts getting so complicated that it seems too good to be true, it is indeed too good to be true, so always temper your expectations from the get-go. This is TV, not quantum mechanics.
Also, this.
If You Liked Lost You'll Love:
Masochism. Just kidding. Alias and Fringe are along the same riveting-slightly-insane-Abrams-drama lines. Heroes, too, but that's more of a "the later seasons will drive you up a wall" similarity.
