He emerges from the training facility wearing a sleeveless hoodie and shorts. Even in the heat, he still looks cool wearing dark-colored clothing.
Picture the moment like a movie. A figure slowly walks toward the camera. You’ve yet to see his face but certain characteristics make the person approaching seem quite familiar. So far, the only thing anyone can distinguish is a muscular 6-foot-3 frame and a bald head.
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Gradually, it comes into focus. The long, thick, black beard. Check. A long stream of tattoos flow down both arms telling several stories. Check. From those arms extend massive hands accompanied by long fingers awaiting a strong handshake.
“Hey! Nice to meet you,” says Tim Howard with a greeting smile.
These hands have stopped shots from Ronaldo’s feet. His shoulders once carried a nation during the 2014 FIFA World Cup. His face is one of the most recognizable in America’s soccer history.
Introductions are not necessary, but he does it anyway. He grabs two chairs. One for himself. The other for a reporter whom he’s never met but still proceeds as if they’ve done this several times over. After sitting down underneath a shady spot, a few traits become amplified.
Howard’s beard started growing when he was at Manchester United in the mid-2000s. At Everton, his beard became one of the more unique trademarks in the stylish Premier League. And at the 2014 World Cup, it was on display for the world to view.
Just to the right of his chin are a few long, gray strands. It’s the most visible reminder that the Colorado Rapids goalkeeper is 39 years old, with 40 arriving next March.
“Keeping myself fit at 39. That is a week-long process. Play on a Saturday and then right away the regeneration for the next week comes, and I need every single day in between to get myself ready,” Howard said. “I’ve tried to watch some of the older athletes and research some of the things they’ve done as the years have gone by as they’ve kept themselves fit. I try and use some of those things.”
As Howard describes what comes with getting older, the Dick’s Sporting Goods Stadium’s sound system plays “Welcome to the Black Parade” by My Chemical Romance in the background. The band? They’re from New Jersey. So’s Howard, who grew up in North Brunswick Township.
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His voice carries a distinct hint of that North Jersey tone, while replaying the moment he knew he was getting older. It was near the end of 2016, and he was with the United States national team. Doctors diagnosed Howard with a fractured right adductor longus in his upper groin. It was a season-ending injury and he didn’t return until March 2017.
“Because up until that point, I was blessed. I didn’t do any treatment,” Howard said. “I just walked on the field. Was sore for a couple days but I wasn’t a treatment guy. I had incredible longevity with it, but I realize now I need to be much more diligent after that injury. And it’s worked.”
Playing into his late 30s is not lost on Howard. He’s thankful for how long his career has lasted. But at the same time, he wants to remain competitive until it is time to retire.
Howard is set to walk away after the 2019 season when his contract with the Rapids comes to an end. The Rapids are second-to-last in the Western Conference. Colorado is 13 points off from the final playoff spot, but with the regular season ending three days before Halloween, there’s always hope.
The situation with the Rapids is clear. Howard’s future with the national team, however, is still murky. His 121 caps are the most by a goalkeeper and the eighth-most in men’s national team history. The last time he played for America was last October in a 2-1 loss to Trinidad and Tobago in a World Cup qualification match.
Is it possible Howard has played his last game for the U.S.?
“I might have,” he said. “I think there was a time in my career where I could dictate the terms of things based on my age and my standing. Look, I’m going to continue playing football for the next 18 months. Whether I play for the national team again, that decision is out of my hands. And if that’s the case? It’s been one hell of a ride. I think that’s where I, again, I just say, ‘We all want more.’ I think that’s kind of where I put my heart and soul into everything I did for the national team. It’s because the end is always going to come.
“When the end finally arrives, I want to be able to say, ‘Look. Would I love to play again for the national team?’ Of course. We all would. It’s a childhood dream but if it does not happen, it’s been good and I’ve left nothing on the table.”
Howard said he’s at peace with whatever happens because he was given 16 years to represent the U.S. on the international stage. Yet when it comes to his MLS career, he’s not quite there. He still has 18 months left on his deal and the goal is to win as many games as possible with the Rapids.
Getting older isn’t lost on Howard. He freely admits there’s going to be a time when he’ll have to start thinking about the end of his career. Until then? That’s not a priority.
One can’t help but notice Howard’s tattoos. One in particular. A depiction of civil rights leader Malcolm X spans nearly the length and width of his left thigh. The tattoo shows Malcolm X with his left hand against his chin with the index finger at the temple. Underneath in bold black letters: “COURAGE.”
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“These were real leaders. We live in 2018 and everyone’s a fake and a fraud. We post something on Instagram and we say we support something. That’s not real support,” Howard said. “The Civil Rights Movement was life and death, really. These people went and put themselves into the struggle. Whether you agree with them or not, it was a very poignant time in our history. I think that stands out to me.
“I think that Malcolm X was misunderstood by a lot of people. I think what we talk about with Malcolm X is how radical he was — and he was. But I think back then, America could stomach Martin Luther King much better than they could stomach Malcolm X. I think when you start to read and go back in our history, that’s what you see. But when you dig deeper and pull back the layers, and I don’t mean in our textbooks — because Malcolm X wasn’t in our textbooks — but when you start to peel back the layers, you find that he was very complex and misunderstood.”
Howard got into Malcolm X because he wanted to learn more about people who’ve changed the world. He then rapidly named icons such as Mahatma Gandhi, John F. Kennedy, Mother Teresa, King and Malcolm X, among others.
Emma Kierzek, one the most well-known tattoo artists in the United Kingdom, completed the portrait of Malcolm X on Howard’s leg in six hours. Howard said she’s coming to Denver and he plans to get a few more upon her arrival.
There’s another tattoo on his right thigh. This one is much smaller compared to Malcolm X but its meaning is still as poignant.
It reads: “BOYCOTT RACISM.”
“I was getting another one the day I got it and it was just something that was on my mind that week. My artist was just super dope and he just blazed it on there because racists suck,” said Howard, the son of an African-American father and a white, Hungarian mother. “Racism sucks, but it’s alive and well. I think what happens — and certainly throughout my life — it’s like the pink elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about. But it’s real and we should talk about it.
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“And I hate bullies. I think racists are bullies, and I don’t believe in allowing people to create that platform.”
Candidness has always been part of his personality. He has views and does not expect everyone to agree with what he has to say.
It also stems back to a personal belief of trying to “do what’s right” on a social platform.
“A woman wearing a Puerto Rican shirt should never feel that she’s in danger to be threatened, you know?” Howard said, referencing Mia Irizarry, a Chicago woman who, earlier this month, captured on video her interaction with a man who harassed her for wearing a Puerto Rican shirt and claimed it was un-American. “We so often allow the aggressor, allow the bully, to have the final say and it’s just, as far as I’m concerned, not OK.”
Whether it be with bullying, racism, homophobia or other social issues, it’s reaching a stage “where things aren’t OK anymore” and it’s causing people to speak up, Howard said.
Those feelings made Howard recall his childhood when he was insulted for having Tourette syndrome. Howard’s confidence grew over time, but when he looks at today’s landscape, there’s a growing need to let current youth know they don’t have to be persecuted or subjected to negative comments.
Maegan Tracy, a resident of Arvada, and her husband, Jay, have a 9-year-old son, Sean, who has Tourette’s and obsessive-compulsive disorder, also known as OCD. All three recently met Howard after a Rapids game as part of the “Howard’s Heroes” program.
It’s an initiative that allows children with Tourette’s and their families an opportunity to meet with Howard after a game.
“At the time, I thought it was going to be an opportunity to watch Tim in goal, take a picture and have it be a meet-and-greet. It turned out to be a life-changing moment,” Tracy said. “He came in so excited to meet Sean. Tim was concerned about how he was coping physically and mentally with Tourette’s and OCD. He took as much time as needed, and Sean wrote questions on note cards.
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“He was like, ‘Whoa! He came with cue cards. This is the best interview I’ve ever had.’”
Tracy said her son was recently diagnosed, but she had a feeling when Sean was five that he might have Tourette’s. Sean started seeing a therapist, who worked with him on how to manage his motor tics and how to control those urges until they go away.
Sean’s therapist was approached by the Rapids about “Howard’s Heroes” and was asked if she knew of an interested family.
Howard didn’t just talk to Sean for an extended period of time. He spoke with Tracy and her husband about what they can do as parents to help their son.
“That made a huge difference,” she said. “He talked to us as a family unit. … I think Sean felt more confident talking about Tourette’s.”
Sean Tracy is not the only child who will meet Howard. Every club in MLS has agreed to set aside tickets and host a family who has a youth with Tourette’s so they can meet Howard when he’s on the road.
“My hat goes off to other teams because they’re not responsible or obligated to do this,” Howard said. “They do this out of the goodness of their own heart. My hat goes off to MLS, the other teams in the league and to the Colorado Rapids for making this happen.”
Gina Miller, the vice president of media and communications for FC Dallas, said a family reached out to her last year about meeting Howard when the Rapids were in town. The family indicated their daughter went through similar challenges Howard experienced as a child.
“I reached out to the Rapids’ PR team and they responded back almost immediately saying Tim really likes to meet these kids all across the country when he’s on road trips,” Miller recalled. “They said, ‘Let us put this in front of him and get back to you.’ It was a matter of hours, and they got back with me and said, ‘Yeah, we’re happy to make it work and happy to make it happen.’ ”
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Tracy said she cried the night her son met Howard. Her voice shook when she started talking about the long-term impact Howard has had on Sean.
There was a day when Sean was playing basketball and his motor tics broke out during the game. It affected his performance, and it led to the children around Sean telling him he shouldn’t be playing.
“He handles it better than I do. He came home and it was during the World Cup. I asked if he ate lunch with the other kids and he said, ‘No, because I played terrible,’ ” she said. “He told me, ‘I sat with the coaches and watched the World Cup and thought about Tim.’ ”
Although Howard and the U.S. were absent from this year’s World Cup, Tracy said watching soccer and thinking of his new hero helped her son shake off the negative comments.
Howard recently met a young boy who was being bullied at school. The boy chose to take karate and then learned how to box, Howard said. It didn’t stop there. Howard said the boy started a program for children with Tourette’s and other associated disorders to help them learn boxing.
“That’s kind of the story we share together. I’m out here and it’s fun and amazing and the lights are bright, but that’s the point I wanna drive home,” Howard said. “TS won’t stop us. It won’t stop me. It won’t stop you. I ask them what they wanna be and they tell me and I say, ‘Good. Go chase it and sure as heck don’t let TS stop us.’ ”
Howard’s really not “retiring” from soccer. He just won’t be playing. In fact, he’ll be involved with the USL expansion franchise in Memphis, Tennessee.
Why Memphis?
Howard’s ex-wife is from there, and during the Premier League offseason, the family lived in Memphis. The city is a second home for Howard, as his former wife and their two children still live there.
He’s served as an adviser with the club, and Howard said his role within the organization will continue to grow over time.
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“As I started discussing with the ownership group last year of USL Memphis, it seemed like a really good fit to be honest. From their side and from my side,” Howard said. “I still had a few years left of playing but I also looked beyond at things that are going to excite me beyond the pitch. Soccer is my world and it gives me happiness but that will end. I’m always kind of thinking, ‘What’s next?’
“I wanna be prepared, and USL Memphis offers me a great opportunity to do that.”
Howard has always dreamed of being involved with a soccer franchise once his playing career ended. Being a part of USL Memphis gives him a chance to do that all while being around his children in a city that he’s adopted as his second home for the last 15 years.
The plan is two-pronged: He wants to explore the broadcasting side of the business while learning the demands of working in the front office.
Former players getting involved in broadcasting or ownership, regardless of the sport, is not new. But look at things from Howard’s perspective: He’s one of the players who helped grow the game in a nation that for so long was hellbent on watching anything but soccer.
But here he is. A well-respected figure who will be part of a soccer club in Memphis.
“It’s not lost on me. I wake up every day. This sport has given me everything,” Howard said. “It’s been an amazing love affair. It’s broke my heart a few times and it’s given me eternal happiness. Seeing the game grow. Seeing MLS grow. Seeing the U.S. national team grow and our fan bases grow. I started playing 21 years ago … seeing the growth and being part of the growth is special to me.
“Yeah. I couldn’t have thought Memphis would have a soccer team, yet here we are.”
Howard’s fondness for Memphis is tied to his appreciation and respect for the role the city played in the Civil Rights Movement. Memphis is home to the National Civil Rights Museum. At the heart of the museum is The Lorraine Motel, where King was assassinated in 1968. Howard described his first visit to the Lorraine as “powerful.”
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“Memphis is a sleeping giant in that regard. When you go there and see some of the NBA teams that are there during Black History Month, they go and visit the Lorraine Hotel,” Howard said. “Grown men are moved by this all these years later. It’s over 50 years (since King was assassinated). It’s a special place.”
Up from his chair he rises. His ink-covered arms, big hands and long fingers extend for a final handshake followed by a “thank you for your time.”
He leaves the shade, strides back into the sun and still looks cool while doing it.
With each step, he gets farther away until no one can see him.
This is Tim Howard.
(Top photo of Rapids goalkeeper Tim Howard blocking a shot by Dynamo forward Mauro Manotas: Troy Taormina/USA TODAY Sports)